I always thought that I would get a huge prompting to go check on my kids before something awful would happen, so that I could thwart the doings, or whatever I needed too. But I didn't. It still happened. I heard what I thought was somebody squishing a balloon, and then silence. I thought it was odd, I expected the balloon to pop and tears to be shed, but there was nothing. I went back there, and sang, "Dex, JJ, whatcha' doin?" I looked around the room only to find Dex, standing there with huge eyes saying, "JJ went out the window". I turned around so fast, ran past Ash who was still on the phone, said something like "JJ went out the window" and I bolted out the door.
We live on the second story of the apartment building.
I don't remember running down the stairs.
I remember jumping over the fence between the apartment buildings, landing on what felt like a sponge (the ground is covered in moss) and racing to find who knows what. I heard crying, then I heard Ashton saying, "turn around JJ, Mommy's coming the other way". I saw her. Her chin, around her mouth, and under her nose was just white and blue and there was blood coming out of her mouth. She was also slumped and her head was down. But she was running to me and crying. I scooped her up, ran around the other apartment building where there was an opening, and saw Ash and Dex rushing down the stairs. I kept shouting, "I need shoes, I need shoes" and Ash finally realized what and why I was saying that, I was barefoot, he grabbed them and we drove.
It was the longest 5-7 minute car ride ever.
We walked into the ER, scared the Dr. and nurse with what just happened, Dex told them she had looked like a square and was on her tummy, but she appeared alright. She was even stubborn and refused to open her mouth so they could see where she had been bleeding from. It had stopped by then. Later we learned it was her tongue. We did a series of scans on her, and the very last one they did, the nurse came and fetched her bed. Dex and I were waiting, and we had to find a bathroom just as they were coming back with JJ on the bed, her head strapped to blankets so her neck wouldn't move. My heart stopped. Something was wrong.
Compression fractures they said, a tiny hematoma in her head they said, ambulance ride to Portland now.
I rode in the ambulance, Ashton went home and packed, Dex was in charge of stuffed animals.
The ambulance ride was long. We only beat Ashton there by 15 minutes. We had to wait for a different ambulance. The one they had switched to before getting to us, was prepped wrong. We needed a heart monitor. Ambulances are uncomfortable. JJ was brave though, and still talks about the nice man working with Jesus who gave her a pretty green bracelet (her trauma id band). The bed was too big for her so he strapped her down with athletic tape. A lot of it.
We got to Portland and were met by the trauma team. There were about 20 people in that room poking prodding, asking questions, assessing, and a very pompous ER doc that I almost kicked out of the room. He was lucky her scans came in and he got busy looking at them. He wasn't coming back in, head hauncho or not. She got an official neck brace, Grandma and Grandpa Jenks met us there. They got Dex and came in for a visit before we got transferred up to the PICU.
We were there one night for observation of her hematoma. The farther out she was without side effects from the accident, the better the odds of her small hematoma healing itself. Doctor visits at 3am and just whenever they had time. She had a big team following her. Two neurosurgeons, pediatricians, and some orthopedic somethings, were in the mix. She slept alright, and even managed to squirm onto her side with the neck brace on, in her sleep. She got the report that things looked okay, then the other neurosurgeon, who hadn't even seen her, decided she needed and an MRI. No more popsicles, no more water. MRI at 2pm.
Neck brace came off, cushy pillow was happily laid on, and we waited for her appointment. 1:45pm, transport shows up and preps her bed to take her to the MRI; 1:50pm ordering neurosurgeon shows his face and starts barking all sorts of demands. "Get her up and walk, I want to see her walk" "nurse get her some ice cream, I'll give you ice cream if you walk". Nurse, "Dr., are we doing this MRI, she can't have anything to eat""Get her ice cream, make her walk" Crying, confused, and stiff, we finally got JJ to walk to Daddy, MRI cancelled, anesthesiologist called, and she got ice cream. We were transferred to the next floor down into a pink and purple room.
Then we just waited, and waited. We ate popsicles, ice cream, watched Winnie-the-Pooh a hundred times, and had a laundry list of goals to accomplish. She had more x-rays done of her back and then again, because the first set wasn't right. We walked the halls, played in the playroom, Dex and the Grands came to visit and she was nothing but giggles, she walked right up to the floor-to-ceiling window at the end of the hall and even stood right next to the glass. Geez, didn't we learn not to be so close to windows?
We dealt with great nurses, we dealt with "why do you need to know how much oxycodone I'm giving your daughter, my lips are sealed" nurses making pharmacist Dad stay up all night to make sure she keeps breathing. We dealt with nurses who were helpful to get her a bath, and the one who thwarted it all because of the IV, and how she interpreted the order.
Walking, eating, bowel movements all happened, and finally on Monday, we got the okay to take her home. Our mandatory visit to the safety store to get some window locks was completed, and JJ rode in a wagon. Kids falling out of windows happens often enough here, they have a safety store in the hospital. Who knew.
No brace, no bruising, her body would tell her what she could and couldn't do. She sang to us on the drive home.
At home, she didn't want to go in. Dex thought we had to move because JJ couldn't live there anymore. We promised it would be safer. Grandpa helped rearrange their room and install the window locks. Both kids' nerves were settled a little.
Grandma and Grandpa left, Dad went back to work, I was left alone. I was scarred. I was a wreck. Then a knock on the door. Dinner. From someone who wasn't asked or assigned. From someone who just knew. From someone who had listened. Prayers were answered again.
Make your windows safe. If you have a window with a 6 foot drop or greater, get a lock. Have it open no more than 4 inches. Please don't think that a screen makes it safe. Juliette's window had a screen. She said she was playing hide-and-go-seek. The kids opened the window. She leaned back too hard. The "balloon squeak" was the screen popping out. Our miracle, might not be your miracle.
